Thursday, April 26, 2007

Wait a minute, who called whom?

I spoke to a telemarketer today, which was weird for several reasons. First, I haven't spoken to one in a couple of years thanks to the "do not call" laws that were recently enacted. But weirder still was the fact that I called her.

I thought I was just activating my credit card. I got a new card in the mail for an existing account, and there was a sticker on the card telling me to call in to activate the new card. So I did.

After punching in all of the numbers and such I was transferred to a woman who was supposed to complete the authorization. She immediately went into her spiel about how I needed an insurance policy service that would protect me in the event that I, or the highest wage-earner in my household (currently my Playstation 2) became unemployed.

Although she sounded like she was near the retirement age, she had a set of lungs on her that allowed her to speak without a break for me to jump in and say "no thanks." Also interesting was that she never really asked me if I wanted it, she just went on with her script extolling the virtues of the new service until I just jumped in and said "I don't think I need that."

She expressed shock and disbelief that I wouldn't at least try it for the free 30-day trial period. I said "no" again.

Then it was the credit guard service, for 10 bucks a month they'd let me know if there were unauthorized charges on my card, and they'd let me look at my credit report every month. Again, it was a long-winded speech with no breaks for me to decline. At one point I set the phone on my desk so I could finish an email thinking she'd just give up.

Finally I asked "how many more of these do we have to go through, I just want to activate my card."

She sounded indignant, "I'm just trying to serve you sir..."

I guess it's hard for telemarketers these days, they can't call anyone so they have to sit by the phone and wait for us to call them. And when we finally do, boy do they make up for lost time. If I'd have stayed on the phone I'm sure we'd eventually have gotten to the subject of time shares, magazine subscriptions, and maybe even a multi-level marketing opportunity.

Can't wait for them to start IMing me.


At 9:47 PM, Blogger Some Guy said...

She has to help you, ergo, it is time to start the sexual harassment. Ask if their insurance service will cover your erotic massages and sex toys. Then ask for her phone number. It isn't clever, but it will brighten your day.

At 7:19 PM, Blogger Kate said...

Whoa dude, you've never had a telemarket IM yet?

You are /clearly/ behind on your IMing.


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