Thursday, December 28, 2006

Glad he's putting his nose to the grindstone

From an AP article:

By DEB RIECHMANN, Associated Press Writer 45 minutes ago

"President Bush worked nearly three hours at his Texas ranch on Thursday to design a new U.S. policy in Iraq, then emerged to say that he and his advisers need more time to craft the plan he'll announce in the new year."

What, 3 hours wasn't enough?

Man, being President is hard work.

This makes me wonder, how much time did he put in before we invaded?


At 12:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, you didn’t know? I heard the schedule went something like this:

00:00:00 – Gathers all necessary supplies to craft new policy. Check batteries in his new Christmas gift, the “FLY Pentop Computer”, specially loaded with “What’s happening in Iraq” software. Ensures everything on the table is symmetric, using his new Christmas ruler.

00:15:00 – Starts doodling as he attempts to decide on the topic of the new “strategery”

00:30:00 – Decides he’s hungry. Goes to find Laura to have her make a PB&J with milk.

01:00:00 – Finishes lunch, sits back down declaring “I’ve GOT to get this done.”

01:05:00 – Bathroom break.

01:15:00 – Goes to let Barney out.

01:20:00 – Sits back down to work on policy.

01:30:00 – Calls Karl Rove to see how his Christmas was. Asks him for advice. Rove proves himself to be somewhat smart for once and deflects, saying he has to go play with his new Nintendo Wii.

01:35:00 – Plays solitaire on his laptop, downloads “Pachelbel’s Rant”. Is confused by all the music and doesn’t know what a cello is, but feels the comedian is quite funny. And cute. Wonders when he’ll come to Madison. (oh, no, wait, that’s me ;) )(my, I’m bold)

01:45:00 – Decides he needs help. Goes out to Borders to see if a Cliff Notes version to the Iraq Study Group Report has been published yet. Is disappointed to find that it’s not yet out, so purchases the original version, hoping to find ideas there.

02:30:00 – Returns to the ranch, after stopping at Starbucks for a latte and a lemon bar. Feels sufficiently fueled to decide on new U.S. policy for Iraq.

02:35:00 – Flips through “Iraq Study Group Report”. Marvels at the small print and long, three syllable words.

02:45:00 – Finally writes down title “New U.S. Policy for Iraq”. Gets confused as pen beeps to let him know he’s spelled “polissy” rather than “policy”. Makes correction. Is so tired from this burst of productivity that he goes to the bar to pour himself a little “pick me up”.

02:55:00 – Decides he needs more time. Places call to Cheney to find out if that’s OK. Leaves message, as Cheney is out hunting with some friends/enemies with no chaperone or Emergency Medical Technicians standing by.

03:00:00 – AP makes announcement that more time is needed.

And I think the first time involved a kegger and some cocktail napkins.

At 10:39 AM, Blogger Rob P. said...

Sounds about right. I wouldn't be surprised if these were actually the minutes from the meeting when they're released many years from now in the George W. Prezidenshall Libary.


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